From Man in the Mirror to MAN ALIVE, author Patrick Morley hopes new book will help men leave “spiritual mediocrity” behind.

Best-selling author Patrick Morley says that the desire to make a contribution and leave the world a better place is a “primal” need. “We have a raw, restless energy that is different from women. It needs to be channeled, chiseled, transformed.”

Morley estimates that as much as 90 percent of Christian men lead lukewarm, stagnant , often defeated lives. And he believes these men hate the spiritual mediocrity they’re mired in. But the typical response, says Morley, is for men to lose heart, go silent, and anesthetize their pain.

According to his research, 80 percent of men are so emotionally impaired that not only are they unable to express their feelings, they are even unable to identify their feelings.

This statistic, one assumes, goes hand in hand with the next one reported in his book: Sixty percent of men are in financial trouble, paying only the monthly minimums on their credit card balances. In addition, readers learn that 50 percent of church-going men actively seek out pornography, and that 40 percent of men overall get divorced, which affects one million children a year. One third of America’s 72 million children live in a home without their biological dad.

The residual effect of this physical absenteeism of fathers, writes Morley, is a practical absence of mothers. “Essentially, one person must now do the work of two. As a young woman who grew up without a dad said, ‘When my mom and dad divorced, I didn’t just lose my dad. I also lost my mom, because she had to work long hours to support us.’”

Patrick Morley asserts that men who lead powerful, transformed lives do things differently than their lukewarm counterparts. “In business, we call these the ‘differentiated success factors.’” He continues: “Jesus made a direct connection between knowing the Bible and leading a powerful life.” Morley insists that the reason lukewarm men lead lives of error is that they don’t know the Scriptures to begin with. Not knowing the Scriptures, in turn, means these men don’t know the power of God.

“Their capabilities don’t equal their intentions,” writes Morley. “Without the right training, their soil becomes bare, stony, and full of weeds.”

Transformed men, on the other hand, “truly hear and understand God’s Word and produce a harvest.”

The author’s conclusion therefore, is that combing the Scriptures is easily the number one factor that differentiates men who have tapped into God’s power.

In the chapter entitled “Every Man has a Story” Morley examines the subject of community and how it affects the lives of men. “Most men live in isolation.” Patrick Morley is quick to distinguish isolation from being a hermit. While we talk to other men during the day, and may have a lot of acquaintances, our relationships tend to be shallow. When not talking about work issues, Morley says, men usually stick to news, sports, and weather.

To keep this real, he asks, “do you know the names of your friends’ children?” The author also asks his readers to think for a moment about the men in their lives they know best—the ones they call best friends. “Have you been in each other’s homes?”

The isolation, according to Morley, begins for men when they encounter the “ouch” factor that goes along with becoming a man. The “ouch” factor includes the put-downs, cut-downs, sarcasm, snarky remarks, critical spirits, disrespect, disloyalty, lies, insults, betrayals and jokes made at your expense. “We don’t need to go through these painful experiences before we think, It’s just not worth it. Then we shut down and become islands.” While Morley points out that some men become stronger islands than others, they all become emotionally isolated. “It just seems easier to go it alone. We live, work, play, and even worship in communities of strangers.”

Patrick Morley’s MAN ALIVE is set for release in March 2012.

Marriage mentors Jim and Barbara Grunseth compare getting married to piloting a 747 jet. The uniform and décor, they insist, do not qualify you; instead the flight training is what should be focused on. They say that while planning the wedding is not unimportant, preparing for the marriage is infinitely more important.

Their newest book I’m Getting Married! (release: September 2011) promises to prepare an engaged couple’s heart for a lifetime. Also the authors of marriage books Home to Home and Remember the Rowboats, Jim and Barbara Grunseth have been focused on ministering to couples for several years. Jim even has a Masters degree in Counseling-Psychology from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School. While their other books focus on couples that are already married, this one seeks to ground pairs who are ready to take the nuptial leap.

Their insights are unique. The very first chapter, abruptly titled Don’t Get Married, cautions readers that spiritual growth is a necessary prerequisite to a successful marriage.

Not surprisingly, Jim and Barbara also tackle the mother of all marriage issues, finances, in a chapter they title Finances—a Blessing or a Curse. “First, you must learn to balance your checkbook each and every month.” A Personal Financial Plan, they write, should have three sections: a spending plan, a giving plan, and a saving plan. To soon-to-be-married couples they also offer this warning: Never allow your wedding and honeymoon expenses to thrust you into debt. In addition to avoiding debt, the Grunseths also suggest that engaged couples plan to pay off their credit cards in full every month.

Chapter 7 covers the needs of the future mate. Some points are obvious, such as: Your future mate needs blessings, not insults. Some may seem a little counter-cultural, like their admonition to the woman that she affirm her husband and “let him lead.”

In I’m Getting Married! the Grunseths even offer practical tips which, they say if practiced by couples with teachable and humble hearts, prevent breakups. They include the suggestions to “hold hands everywhere” and to have the same bed time.

The book also describes three levels of intimacy, the highest of which, say the Grunseths, is Spiritual Intimacy. As for the next level, Emotional Intimacy, Jim says that one rule that he and Barbara live by is the Ten Minute Tiff Rule. “When you have a spat or heated disagreement, agree with God...to come together and resolve the tiff and forgive or ask forgiveness within ten minutes.” He says that some couples never resolve or reconcile their tiffs soon enough. “We met with one wife recently who slept in a separate room for a week because she and her husband were still stewing in the juices of grudge holding, resentment, and unforgiveness.” Jim admits that he and Barbara spend almost no counseling time on Sexual Intimacy. “When you address the problems in the top and middle levels, the ground level issues become resolved.”

In I’m Getting Married! the Grunseths also insist that the weekly date for married couples is necessary and that they themselves guard this time. The urgency of other good activities and demands, they say, will rob couples and, in time, they will drift apart.

Other principles they cover include how best to deal with in-laws and how to balance your relationships with the demands of children, church, work, and community. The book is available here.